Sunday, July 21, 2019

What's Next?

Dear Lorenzo,

It's 8:17 p.m. and I'm sitting in the kitchen talking to you, while listening to Amira's heavy footsteps traveling up and down the hallway that is just above my head. As loud as she is, I'm grateful for the noise. Yesterday, was one of the hottest days in Chicago history and because of this we did not leave the house at all. While I at least attempted to keep myself busy with laundry and cooking, Amira refused to leave my bed at all, save for the times she was forced to get up to use the bathroom or wolf down a bowl of black bean stew. Today was a far more comfortable day weather wise but Amira still didn't want to do too much of anything, electing instead to stay in bed with her slime and YouTube videos of Brent Rivera. I was just beggining to worry that something might be wrong with her when Aisha came downstairs and broke the spell. Just one word from her cousin and Amira was up and dressed and following Aisha up the stairs to pester her while she cooks dinner.

And so finally...I'm alone.

Today was a good day for me. I've been having more and more of those lately. Days where you aren't the first thing that I think of when I wake up in the morning. Days when I can at least attempt to imagine a life without you. Days where the prospect of the future excites rather than depresses me. I talked to your mom about this on Friday. About the fact that...I'm beginning to heal. She's thrilled of course. And I suppose that I am too. I don't know what's up next for me and that's okay. Because I do know that I'm excited to figure it out. 






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